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Parenting Management

"Most children are raised by amateurs, notcolleges and universities whose purpose is
professionals."not  to  teach  social  skills,  but  rather,
- Bryce's LawINTRODUCTIONWant to know whatto teach people how to learn. A college
to expect of the work force in the yearsdiploma  most  definitely  does  not
ahead? Look  no  farther
mean the graduate is socially well-adjusted,
than our schools or homes. Let me prefacebut  that  he/she  has  learned  to  study
my  remarks  by  saying  that  in  addition
and accept new ideas. If anything, the
to all of my other responsibilities, I wasstudent's  extracurricular  activities  tell
very  active  in my local Little League for a
more about a person's personality than the
number of years where I served as coach,degree  itself. For  example, participation
umpire,  and  on  the  local  board  of
in team sports, club activities, or Greek
directors. Further, I have been very activelife  speaks  volumes  about  a  person's
locally  in offering Masonic scholarships to
personality and social skills.PAST EFFORTSIn
High School students. In addition, my wifethe past, new corporate recruits underwent
has  been  active in the local school systemspecial  training  programs  to  learn  how
for the last ten years at the elementary,the company conducts business. Sales people
middle,  and  high  school levels (this alsoin  particular  had  to  undergo  rigorous
included PTA and SAC). Although we probablytraining to learn how to present products
won't  win  an  award  as  the  world'sand  care  for  the  customers. Workmen
best parents, we made a point of becoming anunderwent training to learn how to build
important  and  influential  part  of  ourquality  products. However,  such  programs
children's lives. We didn't take anyhave been slashed in recent times as a means
special  courses  in  parenting, we just gotfor  cutting  costs  (and will be the subject
involved. But we are the exceptions asof a future paper).There was also a period
opposed to the rule.Prior to World War II,where mentors were assigned to new employees
the country was immersed in an economicto  chaperone
depression  which
them on their journey through the corporate
put a strain on families and disrupted ourworld. Mentors  were  basically  a
society. Everyone  in  a family was expected
"Big Brother/Sister" program where senior
to pitch in and do their part in order toemployees  would  offer  sage  advice
survive, this included going to school and
theirto neophytes on adapting to the corporate
world. But  like  the  training  programs,
place of worship. Some families suffered
severe  hardships  during this period causingmentoring is also being phased out.Although
mentoring and training programs were intended
children to drop out of school and go toto  develop  the  employee's
work. They  didn't  drop  out  as  some form
skills and effectiveness from a corporate
of rebellion or protest, but to simply earnperspective,  neither dwelled on the personal
money to help support the family.
Consequently,problems of the employee.Now that new
employees are left to fend for themselves, a
many earned nothing higher than a Juniorgeneration  gap  is  emerging
High  diploma  which  was  prized  by  many
in business. Managers from just about every
families. The point is, there was a sensejob  segment  are  frustrated  with  new
of  family  back then and the people's hunger
employees, and, likewise, new employees are
built character. They understood the valuefrustrated  with  management. Whereas
of  a  dollar,  worked  hard  and squandered
managers lament how little is accomplished
nothing. It was this generation that got usby  new  employees,  new  employees
through  the  war  and propelled the country
complain how much time they are putting in
towards economic success in the latter partat  work. This  highlights  a  significant
of the 20th century.In the 1950's and 1960's,
as the country was experiencing an economicdifference between the generations: whereas
boom,  a  parentthe  new  employees  are  watching  the
normally stayed at home to manage theclock, the managers are watching what is
family,  usually  the  wife. If  a  childproduced. The  two  are  not  synonymous,
had a problem, a parent was always home tobut nobody has taught the young employees
tend  to  their  needs. Children  no longerthis  yet. To  the "newbies," their time is
had to drop out of school to support thewhat is important, regardless if they
family  and  our  High  Schools and Collegesproduce anything worthwhile or not; to the
manager,
swelled with students. The "baby boomers"
were  considered  well  adjustedit is just the opposite. Also, young people
believe calling in sick is an acceptable form
and readily adapted to the work force. Thisof
generation  saw  us  through  the  space
behavior. Where did they learn all this?
race and the technology revolution whichOn their own. It is a sad state of affairs
changed the face of corporate America.But inwhen
the last three decades, we began to lose
faith  in  our  economy  and  ourthe media has more influence over the values
of  our  children  than  parents  do. But
standard of living. As a result, both
parents  began to work inordinate hours and awhen adults abdicate parenting to the media,
it is not entirely surprising.So, what is
generation gap began to emerge. Exhaustedneeded? More training? Mentoring? Nope.
by  their  work,  the  parentsJust  some  parenting. The  sooner
would return home where the last thing theycorporations realize this, the sooner they
wanted  to  hear  was  their  child'scan  begin to develop mature and responsible
problems. Consequently, children becameemployees. Again, this is why the military
social  outcasts  in  their  own  homes  andnow  teaches  its  Drill  Instructors  basic
often had to fend for themselves; theycounseling techniques, so they can help new
simply couldn't relate with their parents.recruits find their way through life and
Sure,become
the parents would sign their kids up fora good soldier. It is most definitely not
Summer  Camp,  Little League and Soccer, but"baby-sitting" but, rather, a recognition
that  parents
this was viewed more as baby-sitting
services as opposed to taking a true interesthave dropped the ball in their child's
indevelopment  and  someone  has to pick up the
the child's development. They would alsopieces in order for the newbie to realize
give their kids television sets and videotheir potential.I do not claim to have a
gamesPh.D. in parenting, but as I see it there are
three  primary
to occupy their time.Today, school teachers
have become surrogate parents by default,duties a parent needs to inculcate:* Role
somethingModel - first, a parent has to be a good role
model with attributes their subordinateswant
they weren't trained for, nor inclined toto aspire to attain. Role models are
accept. Talk  to a teacher and you will hearrespected for their authority and becomea
highly credible source of information and
stories of lack of respect for authority,inspiration,* Teacher - second, a parent has
poor  manners,  and  dysfunctional  socialto be able to teach, not just academic
lessons butthose of life; e.g., morality,
intercourse. Children today no longer learnsocialization, even finances (e.g., balancing
their  values  from  their  parentsacheckbook, life insurance, etc.). It is the
teacher who establishes the rules
but rather from Hollywood. As young adultsandregulations of the classroom and, as such,
entering  the  work  force,  their  workis also the disciplinarian.* Guidance
Counselor - third, parenting includes guiding
ethic, values, and behavior are noticeablyothers on their path throughlife, explaining
different  than the prior generation. Thereoptions and making recommendations.Very
important, a parent has to recognize they
is no longer a sense of quality, service, orwon't  have  all  of  the  answers,  but
craftsmanship;  just  put  in  your time and
should know how to point someone in the
collect a paycheck. This is all having anright direction to get the answers they
adverse  effect  on  how  we  conductneed.Above all else, a parent has to care
about the welfare of their offspring. I am
business and the corporate culture.Now, letnot
me give you a the scary figure: probably
20%,  or  less,  of  today'ssuggesting corporate parents love their
children  like  biological  parents, but they
graduating High School seniors are socially
well adjusted.Knowing this, what should youneed to invest time in the person, believe
do as a manager?THE NEED FOR PARENTINGIn thein  the  person,  and  motivate  them
past, if you were a new employee, it was
assumed  you  knew  how  to  manageaccordingly, whether through kindness or a
good  swift  kick  in  the  rear. The
your personal life and you were expected to
adapt  to  the  corporate  culture. Thiscorporate parent has to also know when their
work  is  complete  and  allow  the
is no longer true and presents a problem for
managers. Younger  employees  todayoffspring to move on to the next stage of
their corporate life.The military has the
have problems managing money, dressingadvantage of written contracts and boot camps
appropriately,  and  interpersonal relationsto
and communications, not to mention alcohol,indoctrinate new recruits. Perhaps a
drugs, and sex. They are raw and rough. Butcorporate  boot  camp  could  be  devised
and teach the same lessons as found in the
are they salvageable? They better be, formilitary, such as:* Cause and effect, e.g.,
your  company's  sake,  as  they  representif you make a mistake, you know you will be
penalized accordingly.* The value of good
tomorrow's work force.Perhaps we can take aworkmanship and its impact on others.* How
lesson from the military services here. Theto give and take an order.* Discipline and
military  iscode of conduct.*
Teamwork.CONCLUSIONCompanies today are at a
well aware they are not getting the "creamloss  coping  with  the  newest generation of
of  the  crop"  when  they  take  on  new
workers. What they don't realize is, it
recruits. Many are social misfits comingwill  get worse before it gets better. Since
from  broken  homes. As  such,  the
most biological parents are content with
military's initial role is to break theallowing  others  to  teach  their  children
individual  of  bad  habits and impose a new
the necessary values in life, teachers, the
system of discipline and work ethic.military  and  corporations  are  forced  to
Individualism  is  replaced by teamwork and,
pick up the slack, like it or not. The
in the process, a sense of belonging andsooner we admit this, the sooner we can
family  is  imposed. This is either readilyaddress
accepted by the new recruit or they arehow to remedy the situation. Whether this
drummed  out  of  the  service. Discipline,involves  one-on-one  counseling  or  a
organization, teamwork, and a strong workboot camp type of environment, something has
ethic  can  have  a  dramatic  affect  on  ato  be  done  to  teach  our  newest  wave
drifting soul. By doing so, it can bringof workers the proper values to succeed in
order  to  lives  and  a  sense  of purpose,business and in life.Let me leave you with a
real-life story on parenting in the
something that perhaps was neglected atworkplace. Some  time
home.Today's Drill Instructors and junior
officers also find themselves as surrogateago I was visiting with a CIO in Columbus,
parentsOhio  who  took  me  on  a  tour  of
and are now instructed in counseling younghis facility. Along the way, we happened
soldiers. The  boot  camps  of  today  areupon  a  young  programmer  who
a lot different than what the countrywas new to the company. Frankly, he looked
experienced  during World War II, Korea, anda  little  wet  behind  the  ears  and
Viet Nam. Yet, we are producing a finehad long hair over his collar. After the
class  of  soldiers  which makes our countryCIO  introduced  me  to  the  young  man, he
proud. In other words, they must be doinginstructed him to go get a haircut. The
something right.If we have learned anythingyoung  programmer,  shot  back
from the military in this regard, it is that
theindignantly, "You can't say that to me!"The
CIO turned calmly but deliberately to the
times have changed and our employees todayprogrammer,  and  said,
have  different  needs  requiring
"Yes I can. Watch," then pointing to his
a new type of manager who can adequatelymouth, "Get a haircut. Now!"The programmer
tend  to  them. And  like  today'sbacked down and, to his credit, dutifully got
a haircut.I had just witnessed a little
Drill Instructors and school teachers,"Parenting  Management"  in  action. The CIO
managers  are  finding  themselves  in  the
exercised his authority and had quickly
role of surrogate parents, like it or not.instructed  the  newbie  on  one
Managers bristle at this notion. After all,
of the rules to be observed in the
they want to get on with their business andworkplace. The  programmer's  biological
do  not  want  to  be  regarded  as  a
parents hadn't instructed him properly, now
baby-sitter. But the fact remains, homeit  defaulted  to  his  corporate
parenting  skills  are  at  an  all-time low
parent."Parenting Management" - Just
and to overcome this problem, someone has toremember, you heard it here first.Tim Bryce
assume  the  duty  to  compensateis the Managing Director of M. Bryce &
Associates  (MBA)  of
for this inadequacy. Again, the military
readily  understands  this  and  has  adaptedPalm Harbor, Florida and has 30 years of
experience  in  the  field. He
accordingly. But can business?Understand
this, corporate America's "recruits" comeis available for training and consulting on
predominantly  from  thean international basis.



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